webnovelfull Ch. 93 - Open Up, Water Meter Check!
Ch. 93 - Open Up, Water Meter Check!
New Event: Global Dungeons Daily Releases"..." Xie Sunan fell silent for a moment. Damn you. So that whole performance was just to charge more, huh?
"I take seventy thousand yuan, you take thirty thousand! Final offer, no negotiating!"
Xie Sunan said, "Didn't you say you can't stand criminals?"
Chen Shu nodded matter-of-factly. "Yeah, but I can stand Huaxia currency just fine. The two don't conflict."
"Deal!" Xie Sunan nodded. "But let me be clear upfront—I have zero combat ability. I'm counting on you."
The two took a taxi and headed toward the north side of Nanjiang City.
"Aren't we going to the slums in the west district?"
The west side of Nanjiang City was the least developed area. Logically, they should be heading west to find the criminal.
Xie Sunan said, "You actually believe the official intel?"
Chen Shu thought about it—fair point. This was publicly released information. The criminal had definitely relocated long ago.
Chen Shu asked, "By the way, Old Xie, why the sudden interest in taking missions? Short on cash?"
Xie Sunan sighed. "School's starting soon. Gotta earn some living expenses."
"Must be tough—having to earn living expenses for your son. Life's not easy."
Chen Shu patted his shoulder and said, "Tell you what. I'll take eighty thousand, you take twenty thousand. Students don't need that much money anyway—easy to develop bad spending habits."
"You're such a dog!"
Xie Sunan made an internationally recognized gesture of contempt.
He'd thought Chen Shu felt bad for him and would voluntarily give up some of the cut. Who knew this guy would squeeze him even harder?
"We're here!"
The two arrived at a residential complex in the north district called Bailixiang Residential Complex. It was a mid-tier community—nothing like the slums mentioned in the intel.
Chen Shu asked, "You sure this is the place?"
Xie Sunan nodded. "You can doubt my combat ability, but you can't doubt my reconnaissance skills!"
"Then let's go. The sooner we finish this, the better!"
Chen Shu charged ahead, heading straight for the complex entrance—only to get stopped by security.
Chen Shu explained with a calm expression, "I'm an owner in Building 1, Unit 2. Forgot my access card."
With acting skills like mine, where can't I waltz right in?
"You messing with me? There IS no Building 1!"
"..." Chen Shu's mouth twitched. What kind of complex didn't have a first building?
"The complex only has Buildings 2 through 9. Specifically to prevent people like you!"
"..." Chen Shu actually felt like his intelligence had been suppressed.
The two were blocked at the entrance, unable to even take the first step.
"So what now?" Xie Sunan asked. "If we can't catch the guy, you're paying my taxi fare."
Chen Shu waved his hand dismissively. "What's the rush? When the car reaches the mountain, there'll be a pit. When the boat reaches the bridge, it'll naturally sink."[2]
His gaze swept to the side, and suddenly he spotted a familiar figure.
"See? Here comes the pit... I mean, the path."
Chen Shu called out, "Hey, spirited young man!"[3]
A refined-looking young man turned toward them and smiled shyly. "Oh, it's you, bro."
It was the "mental patient" Chen Shu had encountered the night before.
"I'm Xu Xingxing." The young man extended his hand in a friendly gesture and said, "Taking your dad out for a morning walk this early, bro? Getting more exercise is good—helps prevent dementia."
Chen Shu and Xie Sunan were both dumbfounded on the spot. How do you offend two people with a single sentence?
Xie Sunan's face darkened. "Not only is your brain messed up, but your eyes are broken too, huh?"
Chen Shu took a deep breath and forced a smile. "Xu Xingxing, right? You live here?"
"My relative lives here," Xu Xingxing said.
Chen Shu and Xie Sunan exchanged a glance, then both smiled.
Ten minutes later, the two successfully entered the complex.
Xu Xingxing asked, "Are you two really here to catch a criminal?"
"Of course. Punishing evil and promoting justice—that's what we're about!" Chen Shu nodded and said, "Old Xie, where exactly is the guy?"
"Follow me!"
The three of them sneaked their way to Unit 403 in Building 3.
Xie Sunan said, "This is it. You con him into opening the door!"
Chen Shu nodded. This kind of thing required a professional touch.
Knock knock!
He rapped on the door twice. A voice came from inside.
"Who is it?!"
Chen Shu raised an eyebrow. Why did that voice sound familiar?
He didn't think too much about it and spoke up. "Hello, I'm from the property management. Open up, water meter check!"
Time passed, second by second. No movement came from inside.
No one spoke, and no one opened the door.
"What's going on? Did we get exposed?"
Chen Shu was completely confused. He hadn't even gotten a chance to show off his skills yet, and problems were already popping up?
He shouted loudly, "Anyone there? If no one's there, say something!"
"..."
Still a long silence.
"Looks like we'll have to break in!"
Xu Xingxing stepped forward with a serious expression. "You guys stand back."
He crossed his arms over his chest and charged shoulder-first at the door.
BAM!
"What the hell, why does that hurt so much?"
Xu Xingxing bounced right off the door, his arm throbbing with pain.
"Breaking down doors always works like this on TV!"
"You really do have something wrong with your brain. That's a freaking security door."
Chen Shu's mouth twitched. He'd thought the guy had some special skill, but now it looked like he'd been overthinking.
"Step aside."
Chen Shu summoned his Golden Slime.
The hallway was too narrow to use the Gigantification skill, but the Slime's natural size of nearly two meters was more than enough to bust down a door.
The Slime's eyes went wide, its expression like it was constipated, and it activated Charge.
BOOM!
The supposedly indestructible security door burst open. The door itself was sent flying several meters.
"Move fast. All this noise definitely alerted the others."
Chen Shu was about to search the place when Xie Sunan released his own contracted spirit.
"Let me!"
A chubby caterpillar appeared, and the most surprising thing was that it actually had a pair of translucent wings.
Given Chen Shu's knowledge, he couldn't identify this contracted spirit at all.
The caterpillar's wings fluttered gently, as if invisible energy was spreading outward.
"No one's here."
Xie Sunan shook his head, instantly grasping the situation inside the apartment.
Chen Shu stared in amazement. "You can detect people inside a room?"
"Yep."
"Then why didn't you use that earlier? Made us break down the door for nothing."
"Who told you to be so hasty?"
"..."
"So what now?"
Chen Shu hadn't expected the target to run so fast. No wonder the police hadn't been able to catch them.
"Don't worry. They can't escape."
Xie Sunan had his contracted spirit use another ability.
Green light shimmered in the Winged Caterpillar's eyes. The glow seemed to come alive, floating in the air before drifting out the window.
"Follow that light."
The three were about to head downstairs when Xu Xingxing suddenly spoke up. "Ride my bird."
"??"
The two couldn't help but stare at him, their expressions strange.
"I meant this."
Xu Xingxing summoned his own contracted spirit. A large bird covered entirely in blue feathers appeared, its eyes seeming to crackle with lightning.
Chen Shu's expression shifted. Though he hadn't recognized Xie Sunan's contracted spirit, he definitely knew what Xu Xingxing's was.
It was an A-rank Thunder Bird!
"Are geniuses a dime a dozen now? Even mental patients have A-rank contracted spirits."
Chen Shu raised an eyebrow, suddenly feeling like the Slime in his hand wasn't so special anymore.
The three mounted the Thunder Bird and flew straight out the window.
For a moment, residents in the complex all looked up, surprised to see a giant bird flying through the sky.
While summoning contracted spirits in the city was normally forbidden, chasing down a criminal was obviously a special circumstance.
The three's contracted spirits formed a perfect combination: one for reconnaissance, one for flight, and one for combat.
[1] 开门查水表 (Open up, water meter check!): Famous Chinese internet meme originating from police procedural dramas. Plainclothes officers would knock on suspects' doors claiming to be utility workers checking water meters—a plausible excuse to get people to open up. The phrase evolved online to mean "the authorities are coming for you" or "you're about to get busted." Here, Chen Shu uses it literally as an infiltration tactic, making the chapter title a double joke.
[2] 车到山前必有坑，船到桥头自然沉 (When the car reaches the mountain, there'll be a pit; when the boat reaches the bridge, it'll naturally sink): Chen Shu's pessimistic parody of the optimistic idiom "车到山前必有路，船到桥头自然直" (When the car reaches the mountain, there's always a path; when the boat reaches the bridge, it naturally straightens)—meaning "things will work out." Chen Shu's twisted version keeps the structure but inverts the meaning to "things will go wrong," right before Xu Xingxing conveniently appears to help them.
[3] 精神小伙 (Spirited young man): Originally a compliment meaning "energetic young man," this phrase became ironic internet slang mocking a specific youth subculture associated with bowl cuts, tight pants, shiny loafers, and the 社会摇 (social shake) dance. Chen Shu using it to greet the eccentric Xu Xingxing is deliberately backhanded—especially since Xu Xingxing was introduced as a psychiatric hospital "intern" who turned out to be a patient doing "part-time work."